I’ve been to several baseball games this year. And I knew who was going to win the world series. All I had to do was look at their food.
Let’s start by comparing the teams of my two homes, for example.
The stadium is glam. The the policemen keep all kinds of serious order.
It’s a little bit Roman actually. And they boast their glorious past.
Have I told you about my adolescent obsession with Derek Jeter? He may or may not have been the only person on my high school year book page other than me.
I have since moved on. I think it was the high pitched Mariah Carey songs that finally did me in.
My mom really knows how to wear the appropriate hat for a baseball game, doesn’t she? Way to go mom!
There are people hawking food everywhere you go. And it’s all so darn pristine.
And the players make funny faces on the jumbo-tron and everyone cheers them for their funny faces. You can do know wrong in the eyes of Yankee fans if you’re a Yankee. Except to become, say… a Ranger. Then you’re dead to us.
They are like the little child who can do no wrong in the eyes of grandma.
Go honey, go!
Derek Jeter smelling his arm pit. I thought you should know.
Okay… well, I can see why some people still like him. He smells his arm pit, then he hits a home run. It must be one of those OCD good luck charms.
New World Yankees…
Old World Yankees…
Which do you like better?
And then there’s this team. Things are much more casual here. And you can see where people’s focus is.
They’re not really interested in cooing over their boys.
And quite frankly the view is more interesting looking away from the field.
But then you start to smell some things…
The Yankee food is… well…sterile.
They’ve glammed it up a bit.
They’re even doing a little lemonade stand.
But then there are these sketchy kinds of glass boxes that you really don’t want to retrieve anything out of.
And some anemic $48 sausages.
And some of this sort of thing.
She was nice though.
I think I spent my life savings on this lunch, when it was the kind of thing you could get right outside on a Bronx corner for $3.
But remember… Yankees can do no wrong in the eyes of Yankees fans.
Until they LOSE.
All I needed to do was see this and then I knew. No wonder the Giant’s fans don’t pay attention to the game. They all did a double take when they heard their team was in some kind of playoff finals thingy.
I worked with a guy once at a restaurant in NYC. His name was Joey. “Joey from the Bronx,” to be exact. And whenever anyone questioned his sausage making abilities for our staff meal he’d say: “Yur tellin’ me, Joey from the Bronx, how to make sawsage n’ peppas?!”
And that was the end of that. He would be proud of this Giant’s sawsage n’ peppas.
They also did other things well.
Very, very well.
And for that, I predict they shall win this year.
It’s all in the food baby.
Who are you routing for in this World Series? And who do you think has the best stadium food out there?